I had a friend that introduced me to the wonderful world of ballroom dance lessons a few months ago. This was a test of my willingness to further push the limits of my comfort zone. I went there in my wheelchair, something not often seen at a dance studio. I worked very hard to be able to drive myself there, which was so much further than I had ever driven before. It was important to me that I could get to the studio on my own.
At first I was only able to be in one corner, then my one corner and one side and my one corner and the other side. Eventually with a lot of help, the patience of the instructors and my determination I made it all the way around the outside edge of the dance floor…this was huge for me. I even pushed myself to walk into the studio from the car pushing my wheelchair. The center of the dance floor was a scary place, but I wanted to overcome the fear and anxiety. I tried and the instructors tried to help…but it’s a goal not met.
I have had to quit dance classes for financial reasons…a painful decision. I miss dancing, the friends I made and the people I care deeply about. But the thing I can’t seem to get past is the goal not achieved…the center of the dance floor. I don’t deal well with things left undone, but I have to find a way to deal with this unfinished goal…..how? Good question.