One Year…..What a Year

Well I have survived the first year (actually almost a year and a half) in my new place.  It has been quite the year, it has included my cancer recurrence, the second birthday Robby wasn’t here for, the second anniversary of his death, a failed friendship and a new relationship.  I’ll start where I left off last year, I am feeling more at home here, that doesn’t mean I don’t miss the old house.  I think there will always be part of me that will miss that house, so many years and so many memories!

I finished my chemotherapy and had surgery to remove the tumor.  Now I am back on the three month plan with my oncologist.  She believes that we are going to be in a pattern where we will find something, treat it and I will be okay for a short time.  Then we will find something, treat it and I will for okay for a short time……….  This time my tumor was sent for genetic testing, which revealed another issue, I am BRC-2 positive.  So now I am in the high risk breast cancer program.  It also puts me at risk for other various cancers.  I have decided since I finished treatment that I will do all my monitoring, but I refuse to make my life all about cancer.

June is not my favorite month and this year I feel like it started in May.  Of course May 30th is when my mom died, 8 years ago.  Then June 5th, Robby’s birthday, kicked my butt! A very close friend from my support group came over and I shared pictures, video and stories of Robby and that felt good.  Another friend came and brought cupcakes from the bakery where we always got Robby’s cake.  His birthday seemed harder this year, but last year I was selling the house and moving, which provided some distraction.  I know it will never be easier, but I didn’t expect it to be worse.  Then there was June 11th, the anniversary of the day he died.  And of course all the holidays, they are difficult, but I have made more of an effort this year to face them.

I have been working on the book a lot.  I think my recurrence last year has motivated me, I really want to finish it.  I feel even more excitement about the book and can’t wait to see it published.  I am going to be posting more often on here.  I know I have said that before, but with my renewed dedication to the book, I feel that same dedication about this blog.